The Senses

I’m not sure exactly where this places me.  It somewhat makes me think of Al Pacino in “Scent of a Woman”, breathing deep and experiencing the senses he has left and the intoxicating complex smells of women he encounters.  The other side of the coin makes me think of Burt Reynolds sniffing Demi Moore’s dryer lint in “Striptease”. I’ll leave it to the reader to decide the camp in which I belong.

I have many “friends” on the internet.  I feel fortunate in that respect.  Some remain fairly anonymous, and I know nothing of their identity beyond their screen name.  Many of the anonymous friends have shared some fairly deep secrets and feelings with me and for that, I’m lucky to know parts of them that may be hidden for others.  More of them branch into the catagory where I know little bits of their identity.  A first name, and perhaps an occupation or hobby.  These friends engage only my mind through text on a computer screen.  Very one dimensional, though enjoyable.

More friends have sent pictures of what they look like.  This adds sight to their persona.  More than doubling my concept of who they are.  Yes, sometimes I get pictures of parts of them without the face.  When this happens I try to explain, I know what a vagina looks like, I want to know what YOU look like.  Most get it.  A very few don’t.

Some will elect to talk with me using the phone or some form of VOIP.  The sound of a voice, the accent, the inflections, begin to round out a personality.  Some with talk on video chat with me (there’s a couple of kinds, yeah, but for this discussion, get your mind out of the gutter)  The ability to see facial expressions, here the inflections in the voice, as well as know what is being said and reacted to truly bring this person to the status of a real person and friend.  Just one I haven’t met in person, yet.  Conversly, in some cases, the lack of this level severely limits the development of a friendship of a real level.  They remain as “internet friends”, not quite real people.

Here we escalate the senses.  What’s left? Touch. Taste. Smell.  The easiest to engage next is the sense of smell.  I’ve been fortunate enough to have been gifted a woman’s panties.  Something about an intimate as can be delivered and remain decorous.  So what’s there?  The smell of raw cunt in heat?  Sex dripping from the crotch?  Pharamones to drive a man wild?  No.  Well, depending on how and when they were last worn, perhaps a bit of that.  Overwhelming that is the pure smell of the woman, not her pussy, but her, the shampoo that ran down her body when she washed her hair, the soap that washed her in the last shower, the moisturizer, the lotion, the perfume she applied, the womanly smells of her panty drawer where they lived before beginning their journey to me.  The smells of her body. Intimate smells she shares with only a few.  I breathe deeply and enjoy. 

Al or Burt?

On Jealousy

I once had a sub become amazed that I wasn’t upset over her finding another Dom attractive and that she might be interested in playing with him.  She had expected me to be angry when I made her admit it.  I tried to explain that it wasn’t necessary to hide behind some foolish idea that you might not find other men attractive.   Because that’s exactly what it would be, foolish.   She had always found some other men attractive, before she met me, since she met me, and she will after I’m just a memory.

Instead of this foolish notion, I’d rather have her honesty and openness about what she’s thinking and feeling.  I don’t ever want her to feel the need to hide feelings or thoughts from me.  Many feelings can get better once you let them out.  Sometimes I might even be able to help.  Sometimes just talking about it helps.  I want to be the person she comes to and talks to about anything, anytime, always, without fear of any adverse reaction.

In most instances, I have allowed my subs to experience other Doms, Many of my subs are first timers and I believe this helps them learn and add to their expectations and knowledge, I also have enough ego not to worry about them being stolen away,  to be secure in the bond that we have.  I am also secure in the knowledge that I don’t know it all, and that she can learn from others as well as me.

Now, am I totally unemotional when they go off to have orgasms at the direction of another man?  Well, I am human, and yes there is emotion there.  But it is easily controllable and overcome. I’ve never found one to love me any less because another man directed an orgasm. I lose nothing, and she gains experience.

For now the only ropes I can put on her are on her heart and mind.  I know her body will crave other ropes.  I will let her go and search and experience. If she is mine, she will return, if not I have set free someone who didn’t belong to me. I’ll still have the most wonderful memories of a beautiful woman who was mine for a while.

But.

My agreement with my subs says, “All of these rules apply outside of your marriage, your work and your other real life relationships.”

Spouses are different.  I can’t explain that.   I’ve heard it expressed by subs many times that, “I don’t care if he’s married, but I want to be his only sub.”  I’ve never heard it from a Dom, but its true, nonetheless.

I usually encourage my subs to put their marriage first, to try their best with it.  To grow together and learn together.  I know I come second here, and it doesn’t bother me in the least.